Learning Curve - Adventures in Filmmaking

My roommate and I decided to produce, direct, and film our first collaborative feature-length script this past winter after several delays and questions on whether the story would be received by Christian and secular audiences. We felt that the story was original and would stand the test of time, but how would it play in the Bible belt of the South and the cornfields of the Midwest?

The synopsis: Fallen From Grace is the story of a married immigrant's spiritual separation from his Christian beliefs as he navigates the sometimes turbulent terrain of married life, immigration, and life in the metro New York City area as he pursues the sometimes elusive American Dream. Along the way, he meets and interacts with an assortment of characters that tests his emotional and physical resolve as he works a variety of jobs to remain afloat while pursuing his creative dreams and American citizenship.

The script wasn't the problem, not even the scenes calling for tasteful semi-nudity. It was our process. We were first-time filmmakers who'd jumped headlong into producing an independent feature without having attended film school or with completed projects on our resume. We thought it enough that we had faith in God and each other to make the project successful. It didn't happen as we'd thought or planned.

One of the first tests was finding a reputable producer and talented volunteer technical/production crew and passionate, not necessarily religious actors. We were too trusting (re:naïve) when we met a well-meaning older director who took on the role of mentor. What he said at Starbucks made sense, but during the filming of two promotional trailer scenes my roommate and I felt sporadically overwhelmed by chaos on the set.

My friend donated his swanky high-rise apartment on the Upper West Side for two of the three scheduled scenes intended to garner additional producers, investors, and donations. My focus was split between the bedroom where we filmed a sensual massage scenario and what was going on just outside the room. I didn't want to be a mean or intolerant director. I'd had a few of those back in my early days as an actor, but a film set with multiple personalities isn't a place for a Southern schoolmarm. I should have asserted myself and taken control of my set as the director. I had no place being a people pleaser on that set. My roommate shouldn't have allowed others to touch and manipulate his camera. We were too concerned with being nice guys and not offending any of the volunteer crew and actors.

I don't want to seem ungrateful after the fact. This isn't about naming names or assigning blame. I wasn't scarred by anyone or anything during the filming, but we were left dazed and confused when the producer announced via e-mail that she was withdrawing from the project after our second day of shooting at yet another friend's apartment in Brooklyn. We were devastated, just devastated in that stereotypical southern way. I remember staring at the monitor when the e-mail arrived and calling my roommate to stand at my side as we mouthed the words together. What had we done to deserve this? Was God punishing us in some way for airing our dirty laundry? Was the devil to blame for the producer's unexpected withdrawal?

What I know now is that we should've waited until this summer or fall to begin filming after having raised money and perfected the semi-autobiographical script. It was interesting and odd auditioning actors who were to have played us on screen. Reliving our past setbacks, triumphs, and things we said required stiffening our upper and lower lips.

Writing a story based on real people and events that just happened to be you isn't easy. Self-doubt and judgment crept into each successive draft. We constantly revised potentially embarrassing scenes from real life to make them more digestible and realistic, even though some of things we endured were unbelievable.

My roommate felt that there were too many crew members, but my thoughts were that I'd rather have too many people committed to the project, than not enough. One of my biggest mistakes was wearing kid gloves when I should've bared my knuckles. Southern guy moves to the East Coast and tries his hand at directing a feature film. It's not crazy, but I will do things differently when we restart this project.

There are no classes or books that will help on a live set. There are no case studies or mock sessions that will come in handy. Anything and everything should've been committed to memory before the assistant director calls quiet on the set.

Now that we know, we'll move forward with our on-the-set training of defined professional and personal boundaries and lessons learned, and rise again from the ashes like the mythological Phoenix.

Adventures in Filmmaking

My Portuguese roommate, Jorge, and I have been auditioning actors and interviewing potential crew members for several weeks, and it's only now that I've made time to write about the unfolding experience. I wanted to establish distance so that I could see the good and bad of what's been happening, and what might take place in the coming weeks.

Jorge and I are at different places in our respective creative careers. He's a new photographer and videographer, and I am a trained stage and film actor who made the transition to writing and editing.

We posted audition and crew ad on Craigslist, Backpage, Backstage, and in forums on Meetup.com, with varying degrees of success. Craigslist by far was the worst because our ads were constantly being flagged by insecure or jealous people.

We held the video auditions in our small living room, and there were times when we felt overwhelmed by the process. I was approached by a representative of an online audition service to upload our audition tapes to their server for future use by actors who'd sign a release form. I never heard back from the person, and resigned myself to the fact that it wasn't meant to be.

This is our first time producing a film. Jorge has enough faith for both of us, but I know I must dig in and rev up my faith and believe in the genuine goodness of people. We're both optimistic, but that's not enough when we're asking actors and crew to volunteer their talent, time, equipment, and skills on weekends for several months until the summer.

The story is semi-autobiographical, which in itself was unnerving as we explained the character descriptions and motivations to the actors and other interested parties. There were times when it felt all too real as actors soaked up direction and pointers that poured forth from my lips. There were times when I revised the characters and their history on the spot in an effort to distance Jorge and I from the people depicted in the script.

Jorge and I have met with a few people who say they've experience, equipment, and filmmaking expertise. We've no one else to rely upon for the time being, but are taking mental and literal notes on which personalities and procedures work best for the types of projects we'd like to produce.

There's more to learn and refine as we gear up to film promotional trailer scenes in early March. Jorge read a few books to get up to speed: The Complete Book of Scriptwriting, Film Directing - Shot by Shot, and Film Directing - Cinematic Motion.

The goal is to shoot three scenes to attract investors, producers, and additional crew members. Wish us luck!

Independent Filmmaking 101

Filmmaking isn't the faint of heart. I grew up on the other side of the casting, directing, and production table as an actor. My eyes have been pulled wide open in the early stages of auditioning actors, interviewing creative and technical crews, a searching for affordable equipment.

There's no class to teach what my roommate and I have been going through, and I probably wouldn't trust a book written on the subject. Personalities are hard to distill into a book, and each person is different. Case studies are often controlled, edited versions of an experience.

Filmmaking will cause you to return to church if you've been absent from the padded pews. Filmmaking will cause you to pace the floors between auditions, miss meals, and remember to brush your teeth just as an eager actor arrives early for a scheduled audition.

While not ignorant of the movie industry, I had to get up to speed on film scheduling, budgeting, and fundraising. A good friend loaned me two books from her college production course: The Beginning Filmmaker's Guide to a Successful First Film, and Film Scheduling.

I know that reading the books will be half of the challenge to producing and directing commercials, film shorts, documentaries, and feature films. One of my business partners gifted me with a copy of Directing Actors. Let the fun begin!